October 09 , 2004

Update (originally sent to mailing list subscribers only)

I just wanted to give all my listies an update on my condition...I might
be posting this to the site as well, but I'm kind of lacking the desire
to put in the extra 10 minutes' work.

So...an update:

Yes, I'm still sick. In a nutshell, I had a whopper of a cold a few
weeks ago. It was so bad that - for the first time in my life - even my
ears got congested. "Wow" I thought..."That's a cold!". So, I surfed for
2 weeks on as much cold medication that I could realistically take.

This actually led to an interesting exchange at work with Bossman.

BOSSMAN: So, Naked, are you feeling any better?
NAKED: Well, as a matter of fact, I've started medicating myself so much
I can barely walk. Right now, I'm on Dayquil, Tylenol Cold, and wine.
BOSSMAN: So how's the cold?
NAKED: Who cares? I'm on Dayquil, Tylenol Cold, and wine.

But then the damndest thing happened...the cold went away, but my ears
were still congested. My inner ears, to be precise. This led to a lot of
dizziness and nausea.

My doctor - Dr. Feelgood - simply prescribed an antibiotic and told me
to come back if it didn't help.

It didn't help...in fact, it got worse. So I went back, Dr. Feelgood
looked in my ears, and said "Holy Shit."

Not a good sign.

Apparently, I had a resistance to the first antibiotics and he's put me
on a second round.

In a nutshell, right now my life is a mix of the following:

- Dizziness
- Nausea
- Loss of appetite
- Blinding pain in both ear canals, occasionally accompanied my a little
light bleeding
- Lethargy and inability to wake up
- A complete and utter indifference to doing anything other than
watching Jerry Springer and Maury Povich in my underwear

The second round of antibiotics are not helping...in fact, the pain is
worse. Hopefully, it means the antibitoics are working. On the other
hand...the pain is WORSE. On top of that, my hearing is getting slightly
worse every day, and Dr. Feelgood is seriously concened about a
permanent loss of at least some of my hearing.

YAY!!!!

I can't see him again until Tuesday because it's Canadian Thanksgiving
this weekend. This means that I'll be eating turkey subs and worrying
about my ears for 3 days.

So, this is why I'm not updating or reviewing anything. I literally have
no desire to get out of bed for any reason, other than peeing...and I'm
considering a bedpan for that.

Now, to be fair, I no longer sleep in my bedroom. I've been sleeping on
my couch-futon in front of my TV for the last month or so. So I could
TECHNICALLY watch some DVDs instead of trashy talk shows. But that just
smacks of effort...and I'm really not about effort right now. I've been
a workaholic for the past 10 years of my life, and right now I'm feeling
miserable and enjoying being a slug. Sue me.

I had 2 screenings this week..."Taxi" and "I Heart Huckabees". I needed
to review both of these for day job. I felt so bad that I sent Johnny
Pintauro to go and do both for me. Let me reiterate...I feel so bad that
I don't want to go and see FREE MOVIES.

Somehow, I don't think I missed much...

Hopefully, this is done by the end of the long weekend and I'll be back
to my normal miserable self by next week. In the meantime, I am going to
TRY and get a late review out to you...maybe 2. "Connie And Carla"
remains half-written on my desktop, and I've got a copy of "Garfield:
The Movie" on my shelf just SCREAMING OUT to be reviewed and torn to
pieces.

And with that, I'm going back to bed.

Seacrest out!!!

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